Teenager inserted a USB cord into his urethra and had to have it surgically removed
He backed up his hard drive – and his penis.
A UK teen has undergone emergency surgery after a banana attempt to measure his manhood resulted in a USB cable stuck in his urethra.
According to a wince-worthy study published in the medical journal Urology Case Reports, the phallic infestation reportedly began after a 15-year-old boy was “triggered by sexual curiosity” and a USB wire was inserted into his urethra.
Sexprime backfired when the cable got stuck like an electronic catheter in the curious teen’s scrotum. Despite attempts to remove it yourself, the USB cord became so badly entangled that both ends were left hanging out of its wired villi.
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The blood-soaked boy’s family rushed him to the hospital after urinating. After initial attempts to remove the wire failed, the teen was transferred to University College Hospital London to see if he could remove the intra-penile measuring tape.
Reportedly, the embarrassed boy asked to speak to doctors without his mother, after which he “confessed” to his horror escape.
Subsequent X-rays showed that the teenager had an actual Gordian knot of USB wire inside, which required surgeons to make an incision in the area between her genitals and anus to take it out. He first pulled the spooled end through the hole, freeing it from the rest of the wire before removing the remaining bits – literally pulling the plug.
Thankfully the boy recovered without incident and was discharged from the hospital the next day. However, he had to undergo a follow-up scan two weeks later and would need monitoring in the future.
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They should thank their lucky stars. London-based andrologist Amar Rahim told the Daily Mail that insertion of foreign objects into your private parts can lead to complications ranging from urinary tract infections to urethral injuries.
It is unclear why one would engage in this type of aggressive member-measurement method, but experts say it is often associated with “sexual curiosity, post-intoxication sexual practice, and mental disorders such as borderline, schizoaffective, and bipolar personality disorders.” stems from, according to the study, which stated that “the patient was an otherwise fit and healthy adolescent with no history of mental health disorders.”
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Experts have also blamed “sound,” a strange tingling defined by the insertion of foreign bodies into one’s urethra. Last month, a randy man from Michigan struggled to urinate after he deposited six kidney beans in his urethra during a bizarre attempt at sexual gratification.
Unfortunately, Rahim said that falus-filing maneuvers are “becoming more common as everything is thanks to social media and easy ways to spread misinformation in general.”
This story first appeared in New York Post